This post, as you can probably guess has sent my mind whirring away. I mean, what would I try if I had no fear? What would you try?
First of all I want to discuss the concept of "fear". I mean technically what is fear? Surely the fear of something is only as big as you allow it to be? So technically you could have no fear or something in general without this idea? I think I am thinking way too much in to this.
So what would I do if I had no fear? Initially I thought about an absolute ton of things that I would want to try, and then I began to think a lot more in to it. So I think I am going to split this in to several sections. Not quite sure how yet, so lets see how this plans out.
If I had no fear I think the first set of choices I would make and things that I would do would relate around my career choices. As you might know if you have read some of my previous posts about having a crisis (which you can read here) then you will know that I am absolutely terrified of the next few years of my life. So that is why I would be tackling this first.
First of all I think I would actually go for the career of my dreams - which would probably be a writer. For some reason I have a crippling fear of even considering this at the moment and I don't know why. I think it's because it has nothing to do with my degree and I just feel that it would be such a difficult career to pursue because of the major setbacks regarding freelance writing etc. Having said that, there are like almost no jobs in the criminal justice system at the moment so I guess that either way I am not going to lose anything.
As much as I love studying criminology, I think if I could try something without being scared of it I would choose to do another degree. I'd love to do a degree in journalism or creative writing or something similar. I think that this is just where my main interest is and I would enjoy it all the time. I do love studying criminology, don't get me wrong, but I am not passionate about it whatsoever. Then again I have said that I don't have a passion in a previous post (which you can read here). I know criminology has opened up some pretty good opportunities for me, including my current work placement with Storybook Dads which I will be writing about soon, but I don't think I want to work in that sector anymore. So definitely doing another degree, or even a postgrad course - money would have to be no object of course!
On a similar note, I would do something about my blog. I am quite scared of altering it in any major way in case it messes up and I couldn't get it back. So I would definitely get over my fear and purchase my domain name and become a proper blogging website. I know a while back I said I would do this if I got over 10, 000 viewers, and I am now nearing 11, 000...but I am terrified of doing it! I literally do not know why. I am just shitting myself about changing it. I also think I would need to employ the help of a web designer to make it all funky and whatnot, but I don't have the money to do that unfortunately.
This would be another area I would definitely do something about if I had no fear. For example, I would tell a certain someone exactly how I feel about them. Which sounds stupid because as a rule I would generally just go up to someone if I like them and let them know.
I'd also get the balls to ask Tom Daley on a date! The majority of you are probably now sitting there looking at the screen with a "what the fuck" look on your face because he's all famous and whatnot. He does live near me as I live in Plymouth, and I see him out and about all the time, so he's not a stranger to my life. I speak to him on nights out etc, and I even got a kiss off him (see picture below) so you know...totally in there.
Moving slightly on from that, I think I am quite scared of trying a different type of guy. I have a tendency to go for the same sort of looking guy which usually ends badly, as the recent one has. So I think for once in my life I need to go for a nice guy.
I am currently at a crossroads in my life where I have just spent the last few months feeling like crap after being treated like complete and utter shit. I did write a massive post about this which ended up being about 2, 500 words but I don't know whether to edit it and publish it or just to leave it sitting on my laptop. Thoughts? So in relation to this, I think I need to stop being so scared of people and scared of putting myself first. It's safe to say I was in complete denial about how someone felt about me which lead to me basically spending the last couple of months in and out of something that has made me feel both worthless and humiliated. So yeah. So I would stop being so scared about putting myself first.
Well I have a feeling that this is going to be a very long section. There are so many life choices that I am far too scared to even think about let alone completely contemplate to the point of a major decision. Having said that, I made a few decisions in the last few days (finally) after about a year of wanting to do them.
I will tell you about the decisions I have made recently after bloody ages of thinking about them. The first regards my plans straight after university. As you may or may not know, I am a major Disney fan, and it has always been my dream to work in Walt Disney World and I finally got the balls to properly look in to it a few weeks ago. I found out that they offer graduate places for a year long placement with them working in different areas of the park. So do you know what? I said fuck it to everything and decided to apply. Obviously I can't apply until next year but I am going to either way! So hopefully I will get accepted in to that. I have also decided to finally start saving to make the big move over to Australia! I know this will take me a long bloody time but it is definitely something that I would love to do and have thought about for a few years now so it's like fuck it, lets do it.
Now, if I had no fear what life choices would I make? Hmmmm, this is a difficult one I think. As a rule I tend to make my life decisions with or without fear. Although I think I would be a bit more bold in my choices.
I think I would try to take on more things. Not in the form of work or anything, but I wouldn't say "no" to certain things. An example of this was about 10 years ago I got the chance to go to Australia and I turned it down because I was scared to go without my parents. Basically I am an idiot.
This is a bit of a difficult one because I am such an adrenaline junkie and I will do anything to try and scare myself, whether that be watching a scary film or jumping out a plane. So instead I think I will just tell you about the things I want to, and plan to, do!
First of all I want to go skydiving! I don't know why, and I don't know when, but I am going to do it! I have always been curious about what it feels like to jump out a plane just strapped to someone else...the mind boggles.
I also want to go cage diving with great white sharks - something that has been offered to me in Australia when I go! My mind literally went "dksjfklsdgknd" when I found out that I could do this. I mean how awesome would that be? I am soooo excited. My mum won't like it though...
In slight relation to skydiving, I also want to do bungee jumping. Ideally off the Grand Canyon - how freaking awesome would that be?!
On a slightly less adrenaline filled activity is diving/scuba diving in the Great Barrier Reef. I'm glad that I can say that i am going to tick this off my list in a few years. I have seen so many pictures of friends who have done it and I am so excited!
In a more general turn of events, I would definitely do something slightly more adventurous with myself I think. Maybe actually follow fashion?! If you ever see me, you will know that I have absolutely zero fashion sense and my mentality is that if it fits then it's fine. Maybe I should conquer this anyway?
I think if I had no fear I would also try to write a full on novel. It's something I have always wanted to do, and have actually begun planning one several times just to get frustrated with its lack of direction and throw it in the bin. At the moment I am considering doing some fictional writing on top of my blog just to see what direction it takes. Maybe publish it chapter by chapter.
But mainly if I had no fear I would pack everything up, chuck it in a backpack and set off to explore the world and just see where I am going. I take major inspiration from several YouTubers (FunForLouis, JacksGap, and Watchbbbtv) who turn these dreams in to actions. I would love the opportunity to do even half the things they do. JacksGap and Watchbbbtv actually did a collaboration (which you can view here and the JacksGap video here) with some amazing footage from Dubai. So as you can imagine I am extremely jealous of this. If anyone wants to take me around the world and let me blog about it that would be fantastic.
Maybe that's what I should do? I should travel the world and blog about all the things I do. Take a leaf from the Big Bad Bucketlist and do some of these things myself? Tempting....I could start off in Plymouth and just go from there...Thoughts?
To finish on a slightly logical note, I don't think life could exist without fear. As much as it may seem nice for someone to think that having no fear would mean that they could do anything, fear tends to motivate people and define people's limits on things. So without fear how would we know our limits? How would we get the motivation to tackle certain tasks? Surely life would be very slightly boring without fear. Fear provides adrenaline and although we could take part in adrenaline fueled tasks, we would not get that natural sense of it.
So I ask you guys: what would you do if you had no fear? Comment below with your answers.
As always thank you for reading. If you liked this post then be sure to become a member by clicking "Join This Site" to be told when I write more!